WEEK 3 - NOTHING LIKE A BUG TO BRING YOU TO YOUR KNEES...

That and two board meetings in less than a week because the &*^$# board members, especially the City counselors don't show up! We'll schmooze more in Barrie... which by the way, how will this come about? I still haven't received anything through SOLS and today was a delivery day.

Anyhow, still a bit under the weather but plowing through my readings and catching up. Still fighting the "WHAT SORT OF BLOODY STATEMENT IS THAT????!!!" reflex, especially with the Orpheus, which I do admire as musicians, some brilliant recordings.  But being a music grad (alas, piano and musicology but still...) and having friends who perform in various orchestras or freelance, I was sputtering by the end of the article at some of the broad, sweeping statements. Let's just say, I was glad to get through that one!

See, feeling better already! Trust me, I'll catch up as I'm taking some time off next week. So, the brilliant insights are coming, only a tad behind those of my colleagues.  So, hang in there, guys... I'm a comin'!

WEEK 2 - MENTOR / TORMENTOR

I am always amazed how my life shuffles to align things about for me. Last week, I stumbled across two articles on mentoring (or "life coaching") while attending to things completely unrelated to this course work. One in fact was while waiting for a haircut. Being the infomaniac that I am, I quickly buried myself in the article until the stylist stood in front of me and "Ahem-ed" me to attention, tired of calling out my name. Synchronicity - got to love it.

My mentor is someone who sees "me", to quote Oliver Cromwell, "warts and all". My mentor is not fooled by any smoke and mirrors I can and will likely try to use to curry favour nor fooled by their own concepts and prejudices as to what I should be.

My mentor is learned and wise. Learned in a variety of ways to get me from A to B and wise in applying these methods to my strengths and weaknesses, even with a swift kick in the backside to get me to C if need be.

My mentor is in sync with me. I know I have a lot of energy: it has to flow out and it has to return. I know my mentor should have a lot as well, which will flow to me, through me and return. Any resistance to the other's current will weaken us both.

My mentor respects me and wants the best for me for my sake alone. My mentor is not my friend, nor my "buddy" nor anything else but my mentor. Nor is my mentor focused on Henry Higginsing me into a show piece. My mentor is there for me. Any friendship that could evolve after the dust settles on our work together for this course is gravy, and lucky me.

My mentor will be someone who will mold me and, though eventually possibly long gone, be part of me for the rest of my life just as many in my past have touched me and are still at a thought's reach though I remain myself. 

My mentor and I will laugh, argue, debate, share, trust each other and both, in our own way, grow.

STILL IN WEEK 1 - LEARNING TO LEAD

Going through leadership coursework, shackles went up and I could sympathize with Sydnie at this point as far as group work is involved. My reaction was, great, yet another albatross opportunity. Past experience, from grade school through to, well, fairly recently, has tarred my view on group work. I can't recall how often during my school years, the teacher, usually well intended having just read the latest student motivational tract but not quite grasping all the ramifications, chirped at us to form project groups or, worse, assigned us to groups.

I inevitably would have a group comprised of one well-intended but with an excuse for absolutely everything that they didn't get done (which is everything they agreed to do) or one "why bother, I'm going to fail anyway..." or one with delusions of George Patton going into battle or, la crème de la crème, the "I know this is off topic..." In other words, an albatross.

I have had positive group experiences, especially when ground rules are set. And I appreciate the great contribution a good moderator can bring. It's the difference between witnessing an invigorating, creative afternoon and living through the last half of The Lord of the Flies.

The assigned reading was encouraging. I tend to be hypercritical at times of some of these, especially when I feel that [translating an old French Canadian expression] they're farting higher than the hole. I flinched when I read "...after all everyone knows what a dumb question is..." Ah, no, what may be dumb to you could be critical to me. I know what an annoying question is and a whole lot of other types of questions are, but for dumb, ehhhhhhh, that can be hard to define. But, Mr. Force, don't let me stop you from telling me several different ways what a dumb question is after you've just told me that everyone knows what a dumb question is.

Some other eye-rollers in other documents. Dialogue: please, a dialogue involves two people sharing, hopefully mutually, ideas, thoughts, feelings, etc. If only one person is speaking, it's a monologue or a lecture and definitely not a "partial dialogue". How many women are partially pregnant? If you are having the dialogue with the other person and yet it is happening in your head, that's the sound of one hand clapping. See, so easy for me to go  "AAAAAArgh!" Sigh, I know it, I know it! I realize I must work on this because there was some good information to be gleaned from these texts.

I appreciated Brian Wilson's article as it is a style I use with my staff. But I will not do the "kiss-of-death" survey. I've experienced such surveys, including the "lets put all your concerns on flipcharts and each group will have minutes to present and we prohhhhhhmis to work on these" at staff meetings and several other re-connectors. These were executed with the sincerity of waxed fruit then ignored. No one thought staff moral could get any lower until we were handed shovels and told to dig.

Overall, some good meat to chew on. Plus a reminder to myself to stay open. Shoot the messenger but at least first listen to the whole message.