STILL IN WEEK 1 - LEARNING TO LEAD

Going through leadership coursework, shackles went up and I could sympathize with Sydnie at this point as far as group work is involved. My reaction was, great, yet another albatross opportunity. Past experience, from grade school through to, well, fairly recently, has tarred my view on group work. I can't recall how often during my school years, the teacher, usually well intended having just read the latest student motivational tract but not quite grasping all the ramifications, chirped at us to form project groups or, worse, assigned us to groups.

I inevitably would have a group comprised of one well-intended but with an excuse for absolutely everything that they didn't get done (which is everything they agreed to do) or one "why bother, I'm going to fail anyway..." or one with delusions of George Patton going into battle or, la crème de la crème, the "I know this is off topic..." In other words, an albatross.

I have had positive group experiences, especially when ground rules are set. And I appreciate the great contribution a good moderator can bring. It's the difference between witnessing an invigorating, creative afternoon and living through the last half of The Lord of the Flies.

The assigned reading was encouraging. I tend to be hypercritical at times of some of these, especially when I feel that [translating an old French Canadian expression] they're farting higher than the hole. I flinched when I read "...after all everyone knows what a dumb question is..." Ah, no, what may be dumb to you could be critical to me. I know what an annoying question is and a whole lot of other types of questions are, but for dumb, ehhhhhhh, that can be hard to define. But, Mr. Force, don't let me stop you from telling me several different ways what a dumb question is after you've just told me that everyone knows what a dumb question is.

Some other eye-rollers in other documents. Dialogue: please, a dialogue involves two people sharing, hopefully mutually, ideas, thoughts, feelings, etc. If only one person is speaking, it's a monologue or a lecture and definitely not a "partial dialogue". How many women are partially pregnant? If you are having the dialogue with the other person and yet it is happening in your head, that's the sound of one hand clapping. See, so easy for me to go  "AAAAAArgh!" Sigh, I know it, I know it! I realize I must work on this because there was some good information to be gleaned from these texts.

I appreciated Brian Wilson's article as it is a style I use with my staff. But I will not do the "kiss-of-death" survey. I've experienced such surveys, including the "lets put all your concerns on flipcharts and each group will have minutes to present and we prohhhhhhmis to work on these" at staff meetings and several other re-connectors. These were executed with the sincerity of waxed fruit then ignored. No one thought staff moral could get any lower until we were handed shovels and told to dig.

Overall, some good meat to chew on. Plus a reminder to myself to stay open. Shoot the messenger but at least first listen to the whole message.